Hating:

LASIK has given me freedom from contacts, the 20/20 vision I couldn’t otherwise achieve, along with rings under my eyes in the morning, thanks to the LASIK sleep goggles I’m wearing the next few months.

You’d be surprised how hard it is to find an extra pair of post-LASIK sleep goggles online, until you realize my post-op instructions were to wear the LASIK goggles only for a month, and that most people probably only sleep in them for a week.

But most people also need touch-up LASIK surgery, real jobs with a dress code beyond Marlies Dekkers undies and marabou slippers, and a myriad of other things that bore me.

Still, what a pain in the ass, espesh considering I make myself medical tape these LASIK goggles on.

Whatever. I’ve worn weirder things to bed…

Wearing:

My blogging’s been slow, and it’s partly because I’m recovering from LASIK surgery.

Sure, I had painless, perfect vision within five hours after lasers seared my eyeballs, but now I’ve got to get through three months without any eye makeup, including eyelash extensions.

Bummer.

So I’ve taken to wearing my Francois Pinton “Jacky” sunglasses even more, which, paired with walking my German shepherd Major Dukes, means strangers startle when they realize I can totally see what they’re doing.

Dude, seriously…

Stiletto Jungle found French Vogue editor Emmanuelle Alt’s chic black jeans, as worn to a recent Vogue/ Gucci party.

Kristen Stewart is confirmed for Snow White & The Huntsman. Allie is Wired has the details.

Bag Bliss debuts the latest of Horse + Nail Handbags

For those of you who like to look polished and poised while toting your many things about town, the Longchamp croc-embossed calfskin bag at Bag Snob is the one for you.

Black lips? It just darkens the natural tone of your lips or whatever lipstick you’re wearing underneath at Beauty Snob.

Coquette loved the catwalk return of Kate Moss and Naomi Campbell at the Louis Vuitton Fall 2011 show in Paris.

Fashion Pulse Daily is falling fast and hard for the Charles Philip Shanghai Slipper

The Jet Set Girls take a peek at the super sexy Rafael Nadal for Emporio Armani commercial.

KRISTOPHER DUKES is hating Microfiber Dust mop slippers, in pink.

Second City Style walks (and talks) a moment in Tamara Mellon’s fabulous Jimmy Choo shoes!

Shopping and Info loves the Alberta Ferretti lilac dress on sale for Spring 2011.

From bright color to ’70s style, StyleBakery hunts down the top spring fashion trends for every budget.

The Beauty Stop reveals three tips for flawless mascara application.

Wanting:

So sad these Manolo Blahnik slippers in black velvet and red boa trim are a size too small.

Looks like I’m going to have to get all Brothers Grimm Cinderella stepsisters on my hobbit feet…

Wearing:

I’ve always wanted to wear black marabou slippers, and sliding them on as soon as I walk into Kristopher Dukes, Inc.’s 1929 Spanglish headquarters feels perfect.

So does the fact that my name is Kristopher, I’m attracted to men, and I live near West Hollywood…

Hating:

The worst part about these microfiber dust mop slippers is that I know they work.

If this is what a German shepherd has reduced me to, reproduction may be suicide…

Stiletto Jungle contemplates the new, ultra-tall 6″ Christian Louboutin Daffodile Platform Pumps.

Allie is Wired has early scoop on Bridget Jones 3, including the new skinny Bridget.

Bag Snob can envision this bag while lounging in a Parisian café.

Natura Bisse’s The Cure Sheer Eye, at Beauty Snob, is God’s gift to women of all ages!

Coquette shows you how you can wear your favorite scarf as a handbag with Via Chic.

The Jet Set Girls are fantasizing about Jimmy Choo’s new luggage!

KRISTOPHER DUKES is wearing Bio Gel Sculpture Soak-Off Gel Polish.

Two of Second City Style‘s editors duke it out over the red carpet fashions at the Oscars.

Shopping and Info loves the Ports 1961 drapey v neck jewel colored dress for Spring 2011.

StyleBakery shows us great ways to wear bright bags for spring.

The Beauty Stop takes a second look at Lady Gaga’s turn in the Mugler runway show.

The Shoe Goddess feels like she could just fly away in these Sophia Grace Suede Butterfly Pumps!

Wanting:

Nail Labo’s Presto LED gel nail system gives you soak-off gel nails under 20 minutes; instead of curing each coat under a UV light for three minutes at a time, dental-technology-based LED lights cure your nails in five seconds. Which sounds choice, considering I’m close to driving my Porsche while wearing white gloves to sunscreen my hands.

Since so few salons use Nail Labo’s Presto LED gel nail system yet, would my investing in one be ridick?

Have I pantomimed how to properly file nails for non-English-speaking manicurists?

Is getting nailed the main moving force of life on earth?

No, yes, and yes.

Wearing:

I hate getting my nails done: if the salon doesn’t stink, the talk is small and boring, and most manicurists shape nails into Chiclets or old-lady ovals.

I’ve got better ways to waste two hours — this Justin Timberlake music video, that Ayn Rand novel, this Hermes scarf on that German shepherd — so I’ve tried different ways to space out my salon visits. But acrylics cracked,  Calgel soak-off gel polish peeled,  and glue-on false nails looked cheap the morning after.  The only thing that’s lasted  well beyond seven days was Bio Gel Sculpture soak-off gel polish, which comes in over 160 colors, enhances natural nail growth, and clinically tests for five-star safety.

That whole nail health thing is nice, but mostly I dig that I had perfectly lacquered nude nails after barefeet in Honolulu, six-inch Giuseppes in Vegas, snowshoes at Sundance, slippers in the Arizona Biltmore, and blisters at Frank Lloyd Wright’s Taliesin West…

Hating:

I got too lazy for the 90210 Nail Nazi’s recommended routine of Trind’s natural nail care. And daily play with my German shepherd Major Dukes rarely leaves me without a bruise, let alone the luxury of long, natural nails.

So I tried glue-on false nails: they seemed healthier than acrylics, quicker than a salon manicure, and impossible to chip.

They’re also close to impossible to put on perfectly — wait ’til you get to that last pinkie — , and the mauves, pink-and-whites, and reds of most glue-on false nails  leave you with a real tranny-cure.

Still, if you want a shortcut to lady fingers for a party, stick on these glue-on false nails in black by Royal 24 and file them down…