If anyone tells you to tone it down, to see more gracious grays in life instead of its bright rainbow of uncompromising colors–如果有人告诉你的语气取缔时，看到更多的殷勤灰度在生活中是不是它的光明彩虹的不妥协的色彩-

If anyone tells you to settle down, to muck up your life going missionary with a mate instead of menaging with men who challenge you–如果有人告诉你要安定下来，以穆克了你的人生去传教与伴侣，而不是menaging与男子挑战你-

If anyone tells you to quiet down, to style a subtle sparrow instead of a pimp peacock–如果有人告诉你安静下来，以作风起到潜移默化的麻雀而不是一个皮条客孔雀-

Step on them in these peacock-print platforms, in these加强对他们的这些孔雀-打印平台，在这些 Isabella Fiore shoes伊莎贝拉胡世忠鞋 . 。

Just be careful not to soil your sexy sole.只是小心，不要把你的土壤性感唯一的。

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Leave your Chanel compact at home, travel light to your holiday party:留下你的夏奈尔紧凑，在家里，旅行轻，以你的度假方：

Your money, mints, mace, mobile, and three condoms tuck into a你的钱，薄荷糖，梅斯，移动，和三个避孕套塔克成 Ted Rossi clutch 泰德罗西离合器 , a sliver of a silver envelop. ，高贵的银色信封。

Use the mirror metallic leather to triple-check yourself as often as you like, without anyone knowing.利用镜子的金属皮革，以三重核对自己常常如你所愿，而没有任何人知道。

And you should–you look hot, even better than the dude you’re dancing with.你应该-你看热点，甚至优于谷你跳舞。

So ditch him, and you and Ted Rossi have a quick bit of fun by yourselves in the bathroom.所以沟他，你和ted罗西有一个快速位元的乐趣呀，在卫生间。

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Life is less drudging through democracy and more aspiring to aristocracy.生命是那么drudging通过民主和更多有志贵族。 Life is pulling yourself above the mess of the masses.生命是拉动自己凌驾于乱七八糟的群众。 Life is besting the rest in your own way: maybe you’re a baroness of business, a princess of pop, maybe–生活是好了，其余的你自己的方式：也许你是一个女男爵的生意，身为公主的流行音乐，或许-

You just give great brain.你需要给伟大的大脑。

So sash yourself with this所以饰带自己与这 gold, jeweled Oscar de la Renta belt 黄金，宝石，奥斯卡德法语就业津贴皮带 . 。 Sun-king satin lifts your everywoman, (house)wife beater into a queenly state, dainty chains lock down your confidence, and topaz tiles would shine nice on you naked, as you play courtesan in your couture.太阳国王缎升降机你everywoman ， （院）的妻子打手成queenly国家，讲究链条锁，你的信心，黄玉瓷砖，将彪炳于尼斯，你赤身露体，你们发挥courtesan在你的时装。

Really.真的。

Your boy’ll be inspired to worship the queen that king’ed him你boy'll受到启发，以供奉御用认为king'ed他

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Better to be a whore than a housewife:更是一个婊子，比家庭主妇：

One’s all fair trade and freedom, and the other’s a leash in the form of a shared bank account.一个人的所有公平贸易和自由，以及other'sa引发骚乱，在形成一个共同的银行帐户。

One’s all love making and passion, and the other is baby breeding punctuated with a yawn.一个人的所有爱的决策和激情，另一种是婴儿育种非连续性与yawn 。

One’s all一个人的全部 fuck-you Brian Atwood shoes 他妈的友布赖恩阿特伍德鞋 in mad red, and the other is I - haven’t - been - fucked - in - five - months terrycloth slippers stained with dull decaf drip from a chipped mug.在疯牛病红色，另一种是-没有-被-性交- -五-几个月t er ryc loth拖鞋沾满平淡de ca f滴灌从插话杯。

Shudder.不寒而栗。

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I hear my glossy iPhone make its old school ring, and I smile at the blocked number calling, and I answer: “What are you wearing,我听到我的光泽，使iphone的旧学校响，我的笑容在阻断号码接通，我回答： "你是干什么的穿着 pool boy池男童 ?” " ？

“How excited are you about those toys you got in the mail?” asks The Boy. "如何激发你对这些玩具你在邮件？ " ，要求该名男童。

I finger the blush-pink packaging from i指的绯红-粉红色包装 Booty Parlor战利品厅 , lying on my desk.躺在地上，对我的办公桌。 “Not as excited as I was before I used them.” " ，而不是情绪激动，我之前，我把他们" 。

“Already?” asks The Boy. "已经" ？要求男孩。 “Did you light candles and have a glass of wine?” "你有没有点燃蜡烛，并已一杯酒" ？

“Of course,” I say. "当然， "我说。 “But within five minutes I grabbed my tits. " ，但5分钟内i抓住我的山雀。 So then I slapped myself.如此的话，我掌掴自己了。 I said, ‘Who the fuck do you think you are?’我说， '谁他妈的，你认为你是吗？

KEEP READING »保持阅读»

I’m lying in my dentist’s chair, and from my lofty vinyl seat Hollywood’s hills look like the rolling green of a miniature golf course–until my eyes slide wide shut to soft black, and my mouth opens to take in The Doctor’s hands.我躺在我的牙医椅，并从我的崇高乙烯基座椅好莱坞的山丘像是滚动绿色的一个微型高尔夫球场-直到我的眼睛幻灯片全关闭，以软黑色的，我的嘴打开，采取在在医生的手上。 He numbs the bottom half of my face so it’s virtually paralyzed, while my mind frolics free.他numbs底部一半的我的脸，所以它的几乎瘫痪，而我心目中frolics免费的。

I dream up a bow-shaped fanny pack that can fit an iPhone and keys and a book, maybe The Great American Novel I must birth, whose theme might be luck, same as my conversation with The Boy last night:我梦想了一个弓形妙清，包能够适用的一个iphone的和钥匙和一本书，也许伟大的美国小说，我要出生，其主题可能是运气，同时为我的谈话与该名男童昨晚：

“I’m getting my gums done tomorrow,” I said. "我得到我的牙龈做了，明天， "我说。 “My entire front lower mouth. "我的整个前下嘴。 So I’ll be living off soy lattes for a couple weeks, and no blow jobs for a few days.”因此，我将生活小康酱油lattes了两三个星期，并没有打击职位数天" 。

“I guess I’ll be busy for a few days,” said The Boy. "我猜我会忙了好几天，说： "该名男童。

I echo his laughter with a giggle only interrupted by The Boy’s crackling voice:我完全同意他的笑声与嘲笑，只有打断男孩的裂纹语气说：

“Fuck,” he said. "他妈的， "他说。 “I want a streak of good luck.” "我想要一个线条的好运气" 。

KEEP READING »保持阅读»

This这 Givenchy shoe givenchy鞋 is how sex should style: playfully tough, smartly erotic, equal parts femme submission and masculine domination.是怎样的性别应该风格： playfully强硬，聪明的春宫，平等部分妇女意见书和阳刚统治。

And like sex, this Givenchy shoe’s success lies in its details: an extra thick cover-up exaggerates a peep show of a peep toe, the tiny polished studs drip wet-like over a beautiful skin, and a sumptuous arch is inspired by something long and hard and–像性别，这givenchy鞋的成功在于它的细节：超厚隐瞒事件真相的行动夸大管窥显示，一间偷看脚趾，小小的磨光史学家滴湿想超过一个美丽的皮肤，和一个豪华的建筑是灵感有些漫长而艰辛和-

Maybe I should stop watching porn between writing dirty love letters to you.也许我应该停止观看色情之间的写作肮脏爱情封信给你。

» Givenchy shoes $535, Barneys.com » givenchy鞋则为5.35 ， barneys.com

I’m in my second office–pick a Starbucks, any Starbucks–and post meeting I decide to wait out the storm of L.A. traffic, buoyed by another soy latte, on an island of a strip mall in, like, totally the Valley?我在我的第二个办事处-匹克星巴克，有星巴克和会后会议上，我决定要等到风暴中走出来的l a交通的提振，另外酱油后者，对一个岛屿的条形商场，就像是完全山谷？

I float to the cashier. i浮法向出纳员。 “I’ll have a sugar-free caramel, iced soy latte. "我将有一个无糖型焦糖，冰镇豆奶后者。 Extra shot of gay.”课外镜头同性恋" 。

The cashier looks at me, polite.出纳看我，礼貌。 “Anything else?” "有什么关系，否则" ？

I survey the rows of pastries, against my will, and see the cookie I’ve been desert island-hungry for since my red tide rolled in days ago. i调查，该行的糕饼，对我的意志，并看到曲奇我一直在沙漠岛饿，因为我的红潮轧在两天前。 “I’ll take a chocolate chip cookie, please.” He drops one into a bag, and the cookie’s little weighted noise sounds like the future echo of me hitting a bathroom scale. "我将采取巧克力片曲奇，请" ，他滴成一个袋子，和曲奇的小加权噪声听起来像未来的回声，我打浴室规模。 “I shouldn’t have one because I want to get crack whore-thin, but I’ll just throw up the cookie in the restroom later.” "我不应该有一个，因为我想获得裂纹婊子薄，但是，我可以只丢了曲奇，在上厕所后" 。

His eyebrows raise into a question mark: his brows the curve, his pinched mouth the dot.他的眉毛，提高到了一个问号：他brows曲线，他扭着嘴网点。

“Times like these we can’t waste a minute being unrealistic,” I say. "时代一样，这些我们不能浪费一分钟被不现实的， "我说。 “Also, I’m trying to get wireless internet in here for an S.O.S. "同时，我希望得到无线互联网，在这里为紧急呼救 back to L.A., but it’s a pain in my never-done-yoga-in-my-life ass.回到洛杉矶，但它的痛苦，我永远做-瑜珈在我的生活中群丛。 What am I doing wrong?”什么我现在的工作做得不对" ？

“I can give you a brochure.” He reaches for a life jacket-yellow pamphlet that someone’s already tossed at me. "我可以给你一本小册子， "他达到为救生衣黄色的小册子，有人已经抛出我。

“It’s like you’re throwing me a brick as a life saver–not helpful,” I say. "这就像你扔我砖头作为一个生活挂式-没有任何帮助， "我说。 “Should I just throw my computer against the wall? "我刚丢我的电脑撞在墙上？ Will that fix it?”会修理" ？

He finally cracks, a little smile.他终于出现裂缝，有点笑容。 “Here’s your receipt.” "这里是你们的收据。 "

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