Super Bowl 1966 ring, Jostens.com

“I almost miss The Boy.” I put my lips to my latte, and the kiss of bitter espresso drowning in the soy milk is faint, like a memory of taste.

“Well, that’s understandable,” says Charlie. “You guys dated a long time, right?”

“Yeah, on and off,” I say. “He really became a part of my life. Of my blog.” I sigh. “I wrote about him a lot. People really liked the stories.”

“It’s tough when a relationship ends,” says Charlie.

The waiter comes and balances the bill on the edge of the table. “Mind if we split the tab?” I ask him. “I don’t want Charlie to feel any pressure to put out.”
KEEP READING »

Zagliani Bag in 18K leather $2,495, Shop.HarveyNichols.com

If it’s defined as deserved decadence.

If it’s defined as luxury labored for.

If it’s defined as a celebration of self(ishness).

Greed still isn’t good.

Greed is great.

[Via Handbags.Luxist.com]

Michael Kors sequined dress $3,147, Net-a-Porter.com

A wedding ring’s a simple circle, a shape as boring as a box. Mostly made of space between, it’s an empty symbol hardly worth working towards.

But this Michael Kors dress? This feathered flapper frock’s a solid second-skin of shimmer, it’s a dress of a girl who early exits a party celebrating some success. And tossed on your flat’s floor, the dress’s sequins come alive under your bedroom lights, and look like a big city laid out as you fly over in a jet.

Like the world you want.

Really.

Squint, and I swear the sequins make a pattern of a dancing gigolo, too.

The Devil styled himself a snake to tempt Eve to eat from the Tree of Knowledge.

I slip on this double snake Boucheron ring myself and go sip from the Starbucks of Los Angeles.

As for sharing anything sinfully delish with an Adam–

The dick was a pussy.

» Boucheron ring $2,450, Vivre.com

You could be a little star, cookie-cut into an indistinct blink that fast fades from the forefront, or you could be a diamond in the rough, fingerprint unique, unpolished and evolving, and unapologetically confident in your raw beauty.

You could also invest two grand in your career so that you can afford these 20-grand Diamond in the Rough earrings on your own, or you could buy breast implants and get a guy to gift you these Diamond in the Rough earrings now.

Hmm, tough call.

I mean, back to building my career…

Leave a comment if you know of a good plastic surgeon in L.A.

» Diamond in the Rough earrings $20,000, Vivre.com

Most chicks dream about their wedding ring: its size, its shape, its clarity.

(Let’s hope it’s not smaller than you think, lovely.)

I’m scheming about the ring I’ll buy when I’ve made a certain amount of money, when I can finally marry myself. My right-hand ring will be 18K gold at least, it’ll be fingerprint-unique, it’ll be a bold bauble, perhaps shaped like the ruby-eyed cougar of David Webb’s ring.

Because the fucking lord knows what I’ll be called when I’m frolicking into my 50’s, Botoxed beautiful and boss and busting balls.

» David Webb ring $4,900 via Vivre.com

Late luxe hotelier and billionaire Leona Helmsley willed $12 million to her Maltese dog dubbed Trouble, and left her grandkids cold and broke.

And since I love animals more than PETA, maybe more than I love a well articulated “Fuck you” from the grave, I want to gently lay this snaky Oscar de la Renta bag on Ms. Helmsley’s mausoleum.

All platinum python piped with gold hardware and 24K leather, with a slight slouch echoing the shape of ’80s Me Me Me bags, it’s the perfect tribute to Ms. Helmsley.

I just pray the python-skin came from an endangered snake.

» Oscar de la Renta Bag in metallic python $3,895 via Vivre.com

Time isn’t some ugly issue you’re chained to.

Time is your tool that’s whatever you make of it: time is a means to measure the profit of your hours, time is to track your present pleasure. Time is a shining, blurry thing you make the most of, time is–

A Dior La D de Dior watch dotted with diamonds.

A beautiful face blank of hours means time blurs together like when you spend it well, the Dior watch has you watch as a.m. flows forward to p.m. so you only know the time is now. And though you’re sometimes tempted to commit the ultimate sin and kill time, with this Dior watch you’ll remember that time is–

Fucking expensive.

» Dior La D de Dior watch $2,995, eLUXURY

I’ve been shopping for fall 2007 since the July ended, and I can’t wait to rock my new clothes. Besides waiting for the weather to chill, when’s it right to start wearing my new fall wardrobe?

When it comes to first date S-E-X, to sipping champagne before the cliche toast it was poured for, to boss designer duds waiting in your wardrobe, I wonder—

Why wait?

Life is short.

And your fall skirts should be, too.

XXXO,
K

» Jay Ahr dress $2,650, Net-a-Porter