Super Bowl 1966 ring, Jostens.com

“I almost miss The Boy.” I put my lips to my latte, and the kiss of bitter espresso drowning in the soy milk is faint, like a memory of taste.

“Well, that’s understandable,” says Charlie. “You guys dated a long time, right?”

“Yeah, on and off,” I say. “He really became a part of my life. Of my blog.” I sigh. “I wrote about him a lot. People really liked the stories.”

“It’s tough when a relationship ends,” says Charlie.

The waiter comes and balances the bill on the edge of the table. “Mind if we split the tab?” I ask him. “I don’t want Charlie to feel any pressure to put out.”
KEEP READING »

Most people don’t guess so right away, but I’m one square motherfucker, a real L7. Despite saying things that make people look at me like I speak French, I’ve never been drunk. I kept my D.A.R.E. promise excepting some social cigars and ____tinis at press parties when I was underage. I don’t understand fussing about first date S-E-X, though the thought of sexing someone I don’t respect makes me gag. And I’ll quicker blow a grand on stock than stock up on designer duds.

So I love this David McCaul ring. Its squared to the third power, but boss in bold gold, its intelligent design is true to itself, this David McCaul ring–

Would look perfect with nothing but some trashy lingerie.

» David McCaul ring, price upon request, DavidMcCaul.com

You could be a little star, cookie-cut into an indistinct blink that fast fades from the forefront, or you could be a diamond in the rough, fingerprint unique, unpolished and evolving, and unapologetically confident in your raw beauty.

You could also invest two grand in your career so that you can afford these 20-grand Diamond in the Rough earrings on your own, or you could buy breast implants and get a guy to gift you these Diamond in the Rough earrings now.

Hmm, tough call.

I mean, back to building my career…

Leave a comment if you know of a good plastic surgeon in L.A.

» Diamond in the Rough earrings $20,000, Vivre.com

So the most I like raw or rough are fish and veggies and sex — there’s something about beauty less processed.

Left true to its core, beauty can be unpolished but refined; organic but urbane, beauty can vibe like this Diamond in the Rough rough diamond ring: its brilliance is in its subtlety, its grace in its unapologetic texture, its allure in its rough confidence surrounded by other dainty diamonds that don’t dare to do more than duplicate each other.

I’m totally marrying my boss self with this rough diamond ring–

Though maybe my money would be better spent on breast implants.

» Diamond in the Rough rough diamond cocktail ring, DiamondinTheRough .com.

Dudes play Porsches as pricey peacock feathers, women pimp the push-up bra’ed breasts their boy bought them–

And a girl named Kristopher slides on Diane von Furstenberg by H. Stern’s “Power” ring on her right-hand ring finger.

Contained in clean lines of 18k white gold, 4.6 carats of pavé diamonds are a constellation solid like your life: bright pinpoints compose a singularly bold display of success.

Priced almost what my NYC fakeducation cost, the boss bauble articulates accomplishment more than my college degree I’d have to dig to find.

A true trinket of power–

I’m totally asking myself to marry me with this DvF ring.

» Diane von Furstenberg by H. Stern “Power” ring $19,000, DvF.com

[Via ThisNext's Blog]