Fendi Hologrammkupplung $722 $511

Weil Ihr Bargeld besser auf Google Vorrat gewettet wird.

Weil Ihre Dollar investiert in einem Hooker verbessern.

Wenn Sie nicht gewinnen Sie die Fendi Hologrammkupplung, kaufen Sie es auf Verkauf.

Fendi Schuhe $912 $511, eLUXURY.com

Schuhe gerade sind nicht die hübschen Sachen, zum zu tänzeln inch.

Schuhe sind eine Plattform für Ihr Leben: Schuhe sollten ehrgeizig gewölbt werden, also passen Sie Ihren Weg, Schuhe sollten auf einer starken Seele errichtet werden, um kiesige Wege, Schuhe zu polstern sollten ein f ** haben, das k-Sie in einem ungeraden verfolgen, rechten Winkel auf, also wissen Leute, daß Sie unterschiedlich sind.

Schuhe sollten auch sein halb weg.

Art wie Ihres Schlüpfers sind, Hälfte Zeit.

Fendi Hologrammkupplung $722, Trendora.com

Thank you all for entering, and thanks to e-boutique Trendora� for sponsoring this Fendi “Hologram” clutch giveaway.

Though the closest to communism I’ve gotten is The Boy taking me to the Kremlin for my birthday, if I could I’d give you all a Fendi bag.

However, until Hillary is president, America’s still home to capitalism. So I’m picking the best entry for the Fendi bag:

Emma!

Thanks to all you boss ladies — and a few dudes — for entering. Read some of the best entries, after the jump.

As always, you ladies really make me want to touch myself touch me.

XXXO,
K

KEEP READING »

Fendi Hologram clutch $722, Trendora.com

You’ve got until midnight to win this Fendi hologram clutch. The best things in life aren’t free, so while I’m giving away a Fendi hologram clutch* with e-boutique Trendora�, it’s no random drawing.

You’ve got to sign up here and tell us why you deserve this boss Fendi clutch.

As always, you ladies really make me want to touch myself touch me.

XXXO,
K

* Contest ends December 31, 2007 at 11:59 am PST. A winner will be chosen January 1, 2008.

Fendi Hologram clutch $722, Trendora.com

You’ve got two more weeks to win a Fendi hologram clutch. The best things in life aren’t free, so while I’m giving away a Fendi hologram clutch* with e-boutique Trendora�, it’s no random drawing.

You’ve got to sign up here and tell us why you deserve this boss Fendi clutch.

Entries don’t need to be epic like those VOGUEs that weigh more than you: just name drop Heidi Fleiss, link to a YouTube vid full of lap dances and dirty talk, and you’re a likely winner.

As always, you ladies really make me want to touch myself touch me.

XXXO,
K

* Contest ends December 31, 2007. A winner will be chosen January 1, 2008.

Fendi Hologram clutch $722, Trendora.com
Give yourself a happy Christkwanzhanukkah, and sign up to win a Fendi hologram clutch. The best things in life aren’t free, so while I’m giving away a Fendi hologram clutch with e-boutique Trendora�, it’s no random drawing.

You’ve got to sign up here and tell us why you deserve this boss Fendi clutch*.

Entries mentioning making more money than god and/or a personal life goal of always wanting to have sex with yourself receive special consideration.

As always, you ladies really make me want to touch myself touch me.

XXXO,
K

* Contest ends December 31, 2007. A winner will be chosen January 1, 2008.

Fendi Hologram clutch $722, Trendora.com

The best things in life aren’t free, everything priceless is never priced less: think an early exit in a f**k-you shoe, think driving a buck-fifty in a Porsche, think…

Sex.

So I’m giving away a Fendi hologram clutch with e-boutique Trendora�, but this time it’s no random drawing. You’ve got to sign up here and tell us why you deserve this boss Fendi clutch*.

Entries mentioning lap dances for the girl named Kristopher who speaks of herself in the third person receive special consideration.

Consider this a holiday thank you for you lovelies reading all the time. It really makes me want to touch myself touches me.

XXXO,
K

* Contest ends December 31, 2007. A winner will be chosen January 1, 2008.

Because as much as I like rubbing my vintage snakeskin bags against my cheek and telling whichever Los Angeleno asks that the bag is real and my fav pet, living in a city full of flip-flops and calloused soles is rubbing wrong my soul, and the charm of people wondering if I’m a foreign exchange student is wearing thin like my impromptu fake French, and–

eLUXURY doesn’t ship this python Fendi belt to California.

Dude.

I’m like, totally, taking L.A. out of my Sidekick for reals now.

� Python Fendi belt $1,005, eLUXURY

Just because LiLo’s top is half off doesn’t make her hot, and–

Same goes for metallic Marc-y Marc Jacobs flats.

You deserve only the most boss from Barney’s sale, lovelies.