Michael Kors sequined dress $3,147, Net-a-Porter.com

A wedding ring’s a simple circle, a shape as boring as a box. Mostly made of space between, it’s an empty symbol hardly worth working towards.

But this Michael Kors dress? This feathered flapper frock’s a solid second-skin of shimmer, it’s a dress of a girl who early exits a party celebrating some success. And tossed on your flat’s floor, the dress’s sequins come alive under your bedroom lights, and look like a big city laid out as you fly over in a jet.

Like the world you want.

Really.

Squint, and I swear the sequins make a pattern of a dancing gigolo, too.

I’ve been shopping for fall 2007 since the July ended, and I can’t wait to rock my new clothes. Besides waiting for the weather to chill, when’s it right to start wearing my new fall wardrobe?

When it comes to first date S-E-X, to sipping champagne before the cliche toast it was poured for, to boss designer duds waiting in your wardrobe, I wonder—

Why wait?

Life is short.

And your fall skirts should be, too.

XXXO,
K

» Jay Ahr dress $2,650, Net-a-Porter

Kristopher,
I’m in complete adoration of your presentation and prose, just so you know. But on to the real dilemma(s): the two top trends, metallic and patent.

Having just invested in black patent mary janes (don’t fret, not Monsieur YSL, but an investment nonetheless), I told myself I’d be a classic lady for the rest of the season. However, I’m now coveting this little silver number, which would seem perfect for my 21st in, oh, 11 months time. Will metallic have been banished in a year? And are the patent nude platforms I’m eying to match an equally ill-advised impulse? You can’t blame a girl for trying to get organised…

Thanking you graciously in advance,
Sarah xxx.

Forgive me for getting my Oprah on–while I’m a fashion nazi in my uniform of flapper frocks, smoked-out eyes, and too-tall heels, I say rock whatever you love that loves your hot little bod back.

Metallics swing in and out of that five-minute window of “in”–but buy gorgeous, buy true to your style, and you’ll always vibe boss in it. The Marc-y Marc by Marc Jacobs dress you picked is way cheeky chic, only, as usual, dude goes Taliban and covers up a woman’s S-E-X. But if you love it, buy it, and–

Consider having a tailor scrap the sleeves and 2-3 inches of skirt. Or check these alternatives: this gold sequined Nicole Miller dress ($199) would make a great tank over tailored gray slacks post-party, and this modern mod shimmery Poleci dress ($480) is a fresh classic.

You’re on the money with nude heels for a metallic dress. And while nude heels also go in and out of Vogue, they’re really quite classic.

And stretch your legs long.

I’m eying DAVIS by Ruthie Davis’s T-straps. 4½” tall, 50% off.

» DAVIS by Ruthie Davis shoes $250 via Shop Bop.

Dear Kristopher,
I have my prom coming up, and I’m desperately trying to find that one perfect dress: not unflattering, not at all typical, and gorgeous, and hopefully, something that fits in with my budget and stands out in a crowd. I’m short, with doll-like features and dark hair. I have an ulterior motive: my ex is going to be at that prom and I’d prefer not to appear too drab or too run-down. I admit, I would rather look nonchalantly fabulous, and make sure that when we casually bump into each other I’m not going to be the one regretting my choice. Any suggestions?
– Camille

Your K actually traded her La La Land prom for Puccini — the idea of dressing to the nines was tempting, until I realized I could dress to the tens and hit the opera instead. And while I still have the vintage LBD I rocked, I’m wishing I’d girled about town in this 24K, 1977 Halston dress.

Pure, iconic S-E-X, though I’m afraid you and I both have better things to do with a few Gs. So invest instead in this brick red, one-shouldered Halston, for few Mr. Benjamins — in a timeless cut, the frock will rock right for your big high school night, and grow up with you past prom.

Unlike that silly boy that let you go.

» Gold vintage Halston dress (shown) $3,325 via Posh Vintage
» Red one-shouldered vintage Halston dress $325 via Vintageous.

A very red eye back into La La Land, and your K’s (barely) functioning on her third night of four hours of barely beauty sleep, and third day of three triple soy lattes.

So I slip on a slip of a Miu Miu dress to pad about my pad, to snuggle with my laptop and e-conversate, to force my fingers to fly across my keypad until seven or eight p.m., when I’ll slip on skyscraper sandals over tights under my Miu Miu slip to slip out for a date –

I’ll be sharing soy lattes and toy friend stories with my BFF at Getty.

» Miu Miu slip dress $385 via Net-a-Porter

Kristopher:

Hi, Friday emergency call.

I’m a maid of honor in my best friend’s wedding overseas. The wedding is taking place in a colonial cathedral by the beach. Nice, right? Not. The dress code had only a horrific word next to it which my subconscience ignored conveniently: WHITE. The wedding is in 15 days and I have to pull off a wedding outfit ensemble that looks chic enough to have my ex (he’s gonna be the best man) drool over my virginal whiteness… May I mention I’m in New York! There’s barely any store with anything white that looks remotely decent. I need help, an intervention from the gods, a latte, anything! INSIGHT!!!

In luv with your blog always,
Em

And I’m in love with you, Ems.But before we get married, let’s get you your intervention from the gods, insight, and a soy latte rolled into one petite, chic, and smoky-eyed package –
Let your K help you style your wedding with your ex.

Too tall heels that spell S-E-X come before your requisite little white dress, always, and especially given your situation, doll. Check these Giuseppe Zanotti shoes ($595, eLUXURY), a 4.25″gladiator of a wedge, which’ll rock right with this white frock.

Now go get your beach party on, love.

I love wearing high-waisted skirts at the moment - but how would I wear a jacket/sweater with one in winter? A normal length jacket would obviously cover up the high waist, but on the other hand a cropped jacket would look out of proportion!
- Karina

A cropped jacket would actually be perfectly in proportion, doll. And if your high-waisted skirt’s a skinny pencil of a thing, a cropped swing coat or capelet would bring balance to your long, thin bottom.

If you don’t like to rock such an exaggerated look, though -

Find me in a beaded cocktail dress, too-tall heels, and a smoky eye in the AM at Starbucks.

- Your K gets it.

KEEP READING »

Hey, Kris! Love the blog. How ’bout advice on wearing a black satin bubble skirt? I don’t wanna look costumey… Thanks.
Em

Life, love, is all about balance.

So forget any sort of tunic or loose blouse on top of that bubble skirt, and opt instead for a slinky, second-skin top. Your black bubble skirt would rock right with a simple, ballerina leotard tucked into it. I dig this white scoop neck and back leotard ($14).

Let the volume of your bubble skirt stretch your legs long by slipping on some skyscraper heels, like these lace-up, lacey Marc-y Marc by Marc Jacobs pumps ($179).

Go get your holiday party on.