With the exception of a few flats, all my shoes have at least a four-inch-high arch — not heel. Platforms are a shortcut to standing five inches taller, but you need at least four inches of exaggerated arch to tilt you onto your tip-toes and stretch your legs long.

And now I’ve broken my rule with these Donna Karan Collection cork slides. These Donna Karan cork slides have a 4¼-inch heel that cheats with a two-inch platform, but I’ll compromise for the sandals’ retro chunky heel that wears like air.

What do I dig most about these Donna Karan Collection cork slides, besides their ridick comfort letting me walk for hours along a Basque beach during my July vacay?

The way the silk-linen straps hook the back of that cork heel. So choice…

Over the last couple of years I’ve edited my look down to a formula: bed-head, bobbed hair; a racerback tank dress; a shawl-neck wrap coat; stiletto slippers; and a vintage Hermes Herbag.

You can’t beat an Hermes Herbag. Equal parts form and function, its classic Kelly shape is formed out of bridle leather and rubberized canvas. I tote a 30 cm Hermes Herbag to dinner and park-play with my German Shepherd Major Dukes, and a 40cm Hermes Herbag travels with me on the flying bus.

Even better? Vintage Hermes Herbags disassemble into interchangeable parts. I have three Hermes Herbags, and I mix and match their bags and straps…

Hermes Herbag Assembly Instructions

I’m a sucker for sexy slippers and Donna Karan Collection shoes.

But these Donna Karan Collection lace-up mules are the opposite of why I love Donna Karan Collection kicks. These mules are so feminine, fashiony, and fussy –

All words that start with “f” that I’d rather never use.

These Donna Karan Collection mules are just a $300 chew toy for Major Dukes…

I don’t dig cloches because I’m a sucker for flapper fashion; I like flapper fashion because I’m a sucker for cloches. I love how those bell-shaped hats half-cover your eyes, so that you have to hold your head up hyper-high to look at the world.

That’s how a lady should always walk.

Too bad I didn’t see this Eugenia Kim black cloche while I was enjoying Aloha Rag’s sale on my Honolulu holiday…

I’m so bummed this Halston ultrasuede shirt dress and its matching hat and bag are sold, though the likelihood of me covering my bobbed hair or trading my Kelly bag to wear either is low. Sometimes I want to buy beautiful things just so other people who appreciate them less can’t have them; instead of giving away or selling old clothes sometimes I just shred them to pieces.

It’s a good thing I generally don’t like pets…

I just snagged these Giuseppe Zanotti rubber wedge boots on eBay. With a pebbled rubber wedge and fur lining, these’ll be perfect for Sundance–and those 72°F and sunny December days in LA.

It gets cold when you sit all day at your desk in just a La Perla laser-cut thong.

No one ever said working from home was glamorous…

While I lived in New York, freelancing as a writer and finishing up a BA in Pseudo-Intellectual Masturbation, I had a zoo of vintage fur muffs: sheared rabbit dyed to look like leopard, choco mink, and the wildest wiry black pelt, all lined in satin and interior pockets. Fur muffs are genius: why fumble with gloves and a bag when you could slip in and out of something so chic?

I dig this Sang A fox fur muff for its form and function, though I’m back in Hollywood, where it’s considered a stay-at-home snow day if it rains…

It’s like these Marc by Marc Jacobs zipper earrings are inviting you to do their wearer a favor and pull them out…

So I listen to too much Jay-Z.

Months ago, I had a pinkie ring planned: a white gold square up to my little knuckle, with a “K” lightly hand-etched on.

And then I saw this photo of Coco Chanel.

Of course…