Wanting.

Jimmyjane massage is a happy coupling of brain and body: their Contour ceramic massage stone blends Beyond Euphoric massage lotion into your skin, while the lotion’s natural plant extracts help release Beta-Endorphins…

Using.

Jimmyjane massage candles burn beautifully: there’s a line between pleasure and pain, and the candle’s hot wax deliciously drip-drops up to it…

Hating.

Or “lazing” this Beyond Massage gift set? The Beyond Message kit is actually great: three Jimmyjane massage lotions come with a palette to mix on. It just seems too complicated for when you want to wind down, curl up, and be petted…

Wanting.

I wish L’Artisan Parfumeur made a tubereuse candle–then I’d stop spritzing my bedroom and pillows with their perfume, turning L’Artisan Parfumeur’s Tubereuse into the world’s most expensive alternative to Febreze…

Wearing.

L’Artisan Parfumeur’s Tubereuse is my daily. It’s feminine without being girly, distinct without being distracting — it’s one of those scents that’ll make people tell you that you smell good, not wonder what you’re wearing. I like to spray it in front of me, and walk into its cloud after I shower…

Hating.

So L’Artisan Parfumeur for Bottega is a good coupling: both are quiet luxury based on craftsmanship. I’m just over Big Brand for Big Brand deals…

Wanting.

Jimmyjane massage candles are great as regular candles — they burn clean and flavor the air. And they’re better as a way to ruin your sheets with hot wax. The scents are delish and unisex, and the melted wax doubles as spa-quality, massage oil…

Using.

Booty Parlor sent me their “Don’t Stop” massage candles. The curvy candle holder is easy to grip, and the sandalwood vanilla scent is sweet without being saccharine. The massage candle’s wax melts fast for a slow, hot drip that dances between pleasure and pain…

Hating

People who buy this massage candle’s cheese shouldn’t be practicing making babies…

Wanting.

I love Late Chocolate’s blindfold — binding your eyes opens you to trust spiked with risk, which can be as delicious as pleasure spiced with pain.

A silk tie would work as well, though…

Using.

Late Chocolate’s Pleasure Box houses flavored and enhancing rubs, in purse-ready packages.  A Late Chocolate Pleasure Box is discreet enough to lay open on your nightstand — but its results aren’t so quiet…

Hating.

Love and hate are two sides of the same coin, and I’m flipping on this Late Chocolate perfume — it’s got this thick smell, almost like chocolate liqueur and orange. If you don’t have a signature scent yet, Late Chocolate’s perfume is worth sniffing…

Wanting.

Marlies Dekkers is the Giuseppe Zanotti of lingerie: she crafts quirky, bold, intelligent sex.

I love that rope lacing together the back of this Marlies Dekkers thong…

Wearing.

I found these on sale and bought every pair the store had. That backside poof is what a woman should be: amusing and sexy. Buy yourself a pair for V Day…

Hating.

So I’d sport this Marlies Dekker thong. The only reason I’m hating is because that print distracts from the real architecture of Marlies Dekkers lingerie…

Wanting.

Peekaboo. Buy these Kiki De Montparnasse panties (or spend $75+ any way else at KikiDM.com) and get a free gift.

Just use promocode “XXXO”…

Wearing.

Real luxury is completely inconspicuous. Like boyish, black, cashmere bloomers…

Hating.

Red lace lingerie is tough. It only works when it’s intentionally, thoroughly trashy. Otherwise, it feels cheap…

Wanting.

I love all those extra straps, creating space to highlight your skin.  Luscious detailing is luxury, so is enjoying something alone — wear this under a simple, subtle shift dress, so the pleasure of this Marlies Dekkers bra is all yours…

Wearing.

Flock-print halos and stars add richness typical of Marlies Dekkers detailing.

Besides all that, this Marlies Dekkers bra just makes your breasts look better.

Click over and check out the corset-laced back of this Marlies Dekkers bra…

Hating.

I love the graphicness of Marlies Dekkers bras, but I think this yellow plaid — sweet as it is, as against those striped straps — distracts from the craftsman ship of the bra.

Hell, I’d wear it still…

Wanting.

Perfect for that white dress that’s not sheer enough for a slip, but not thick enough to just tease –

This La Perla naked thong’ll turn that skirt into a silhouette of legs…

Wearing.

A nude panty is sexy: it’s like going commando, sans sloppiness.

I love how this Marlies Dekkers thong looks like it’s framing your skin…

Hating.

I didn’t get Cosabella, and I don’t get Hanky Panky. Both of these lines vibe both cheap and overpriced…

Wanting.

Jimmyjane massage candles are the best: they burn clean, they smell wonderful, and they get even better when you blow them out.

I wonder how this Jimmyjane bourbon candle smells…

Using.

This Voluspa bourbon candle burns steady, and gives off a subtle vanilla scent, without any sugariness…

Hating.

There’s no way something so ugly can smell good…

Wanting.

Silk pillows are supposed to keep your face from wrinkling, but I’m convinced nothing but needles in 90210 will save you –

These silk-covered and silk-filled pillows just feel gorgeous.

Plus, KikiDM.com gives you 40% off, free shipping, and a bottle of signature body shimmer with promocode KDLOVE…

Using.

Just like anything silk, this 100% silk duvet is warm when you’re too cool, cool when you’re hot. And spoiling yourself will cost little more than settling for a decent duvet.

Please read that last sentence again, and swap out “duvet” with “dude,” “job,” and “overall quality of life”…

Hating.

Satin sheets are sexy, but red satin-polyester sheets?

I suppose they complement that leopard-print, pump-shaped chair, and the “Tramp” name necklace…